Holy shit! What’s going down at the docks in Tacoma right now? It sounds like a fragging war just kicked off. There’s automatic weapon fire, explosions and I think a dragon is roaring! I can see flames from 15 blocks away! Something’s flying around and something’s shooting the hell out of it!
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Just another day in paradise!
May peace find those fleeing the terrifying inferno along the Tacoma waterfront tonight, as such horrific violence is merely the tragic consequence of an isolated, fearful world tearing itself apart. Please do not wander the smoky streets in panic, dear neighbors. Come directly to our Tacoma shelter doors, where you may rest safely away from the gunfire and firestorm within the soothing calm of our loving family.
In Unity,
Brother Julian